Last night I had a very bad night terror and sleep paralysis, why because of PTSD but I still don’t know why I had the night terror! I haven’t been under enough stress to cause this but it was terrifying not the less! I sit writing half paralyzed with fear to tell you what the dream was about! And were some of the PTSD came from!
About 21 years ago I was 13- 14 years old and that was when things started to go wrong , horribly wrong! I was first having dreams that I did not understand that they might be the first PTSD nightmares and I the night mare was collection of my dreams that I had at the time to the actual waking experiences that I had to go through! One was the fact that I had these to bitches who will remain nameless for privacy sake! As I don’t want to embarrass them any more that they enough shame already! That being said the two girls were riding my ass! One of them was my best friend from kindergarten who was talking the school bully and that I had to deal with her name will stay off this as well! They first made me look anorexic and / bulimic and suicidal! At the time I did not even think that way as I had nota qualm in the world but with the two bitches! I had to deal with them……I felt so unsafe that I had to take martial arts some the will calm me down for a little bit! As for the dreams they were disturbing nonetheless and no about of martial arts would ward them away! But in this night terror I not only had to deal with bullying but the or also having to fight this demon! That looked like an evil Twistid finch bird that was eating everyone! That being said it was very gory…..I will not get into that much detail about that!
When I woke up it was a bitch to move my body and I had to look at the time it was 10 in the morning, that was how I knew I had a night terror and that I was paralyzed! I had to get out of bed but i was also paralyzed with fears and I had to take a few deep breathes to cool my jets! But still I had to go swimming! Something because of the major nightmare I had to decline because I was still frightened to move a fucking muscle! That and the water would really trigger me to day! I don’t know what cause this fucking dream! I had a bitch of a time getting dressed and I had to rush through the breakfast for fear of a dremon getting it! I was still in the twilight of waking up and being a sleep!
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