I thought I had a good night sleep that wasn’t until I saw that my iPad was ripped off the charger yet another night terror my iPad is now at 8% which is a pain in my ass to be honest with you the night terror was not exactly about t*rrorists, or people being stupid, but instead, this was about my boyfriend cheating on me as you can guess that that was not the best streamed to have and I ended up having a must’ve had a thrashing moment and ripped the iPad off of my charger. That being said that was not my intention for this time I’m getting mighty sick of these damn night terrors, some people call him night horror some people call him nightmare but I know what they are night terrors Because of the simple fact that they terrorize you are at night and you end up laughing and destroying stuff in the middle of the night, this is not the first time the fell off his hinges or that I broke something in my sleep, trying to aggravating, or I lost an earring to be honest with you my third and second earlobe on my left ear could’ve been the result of the fact that I had a bad night, terror and the damn thing was ripped out of my ear, causing me to have three earlobes two on my left ear and my right ear that being said that was not what I wanted these night terrors half to go! for the simple fact that they are aggravating and they do nothing more than a piss me off than anything else. I find them to be and annoying for me and I’m getting mighty fed up with them. This is great now my iPad is at 9%. at least it’s charging, but this is a pain in my ass for sure. I don’t know why we end up having to sleep. It’s a pain in the ass to be honest with you. I would like to be able to just be cold and not touch anything when I sleep but then again that is a different story on the last I wish that was a case as I said, I think I may have said this and I’m going to see a psychiatrist and hopefully this will put the end to the goddamn night terrors that I’ve been having these things are not fucking fun to be honest with you!
I am sorry if I am, but this is requiring foul language. PTSD is my favorite See you next Tuesday. You can guess what the word is there! I’m not gonna say the actual word you can guess what it is. I don’t like PTSD I don’t like having night terrors. The only thing good about PTSD that I’ve had to deal with was talking to celebrities and also have post traumatic stress disorder like Thea van seijan! And those kind of people are pretty good and learning about different celebrities and stuff they’re talking to them. I wish I was honking your horn on this one, but that’s the only good thing about PTSD is that even other people that might have cloud society that male also have PTSD! When I was talking to the friendship, there was going pretty fast. I was actually pretty happy that I was talking to someone who’s a celebrity one of my favourite singers who happened to have PTSD that being said I was able to talk to her and we were able to exchange PTSD stories and we became fast friends! She is the one saying bloody samurai and other songs that are very interesting. She has a very interesting voice that being said so thinking I’m bullshitting you I used to have the Instagram account that’s where we would talk on Instagram she would not ask for money that was long before scammers were around to pose as celebrities and what not and ruin your day. That being said it was very interesting to see that that was about the only good thing about PTSD.!
Other than that, it’s a pain in the ass I’d rather not deal with. It’s a pain in the ass and I can’t stand it to be honest with you. I can’t wait to see the psychiatrist so I can get whatever I need done to fix this 35 year-old fuck up that is my brain! Also, last night, I also have another beef, which was the fact that I tried to look for the northern lights in my backyard and saw Jack shit. I don’t know why, but I never saw the northern lights is triggering to me that I cannot see the northern lights and when I go on Facebook, I see posts The northern lights in the area I’m in the Ottawa area so that being said I should be able to see the fucking things, but I don’t and it’s kind of aggravating to be honest with you. When will I get to see them? I will never know but it’s kind of annoying to be honest with you that I cannot see the northern lights and that I am kind of aggravated. I only saw the one time when I was about 22 years old after my grandmother passed away. I ended up seeing the northern lights and I guess it was her way of saying I’m still around being said I never saw the northern lights ever again after that and it kind of pisses me off that I never saw them again!
That being said, I wish I would start the day on a better note and I will now at least I had a more rest and sleep, but I wish I did not thrash around in my sleep when I have these goddamn night terrors asleep was actually pretty good on its own except for the night terrors, which I did not need! There are four things in my 35 years on this planet that I have to squat to about to a psychiatrist one of them being the goddamn PTSD the other the damn night terrors dissociation I had that happen once and then of course, the fucking anger that I usually have that comes after these incidents I don’t exactly enjoy getting angry. I don’t enjoy dissociating when I have a Crappy day being said it kind of a shit show and it’s gonna stop or be cleaned up. It’s kind of aggravating to be honest with you. I just hope the day will be a lot better than my goddamn sleep and that I can actually go and enjoy the night time tomorrow when I clean up my bedding and clean Myself after basketball yes I do have basketball tonight. That being said it’s very interesting. How that’s gonna turn out the basketball I’m on the fence about because for the simple reason was last year. I kept thinking my boyfriend was cheating on me which was a delusion and disassociation that I had which was not exactly my cup of tea , I was being very wishy-washy about the basketball something I have to learn about learn a deal with I mean in order to not blow my stack as every time I want to basketball last year I kept blowing my stack over. The stupidest thing would not dissociate would end up blowing my stack last and it was not good for my mental health being said I wonder what this year will bring I’m kinda nervous about going to basketball because I’m afraid that something will fuck it up for me! That thing would be my brain and I know for sure it will be my brain for sure because it always fucks shit up for me anyway!
Also, did you know there is an emotional check in with your new iPad if your iPad is and this sounds like a fucking commercial but if it’s iOS 17 or later, you can actually check in with yourself emotionally with these emotional logs and they have these nice flowers and stuff that’s kind of very interesting to be honest with you I’ve had a couple crappy days and a couple more good days. I think that being said I should show you these flowers are very well pieces of artwork!
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