Saturday, September 21, 2024

September 21, 2024 p.m.

 As I lay in bed

A dream envelopes my bones

And I am in a vertical reality 

But there is not the goggles 

Instead I have it around  me all over

As if in a trance

She dances

But I see her she doesn't look like a healthy woman

She looks like a skeleton that is belly dancing

Is this one of my night terrors 

Or is this the end of it all! What I will not 

See is her face 

As her face was covered with

Hair and only that

She wears a belly dancers outfit

But she seems of corrosion

What is that smell

Acid

But I am not going to find out

So I try to wake myself up

But the banshee 

Keeps coming closer and closer

Until she reveals her face which looks like

Death warmed over and 

She lets out the scream

A scream so horrific it ruptures your organs 

A she sucks your soul from you body

Leaving an empty shell

I did know about this banshee I never....

I have had heard of the shadow people and sleep paralysis 

And I when is this what I am going through

I scream Susie wake up 

From christs sake wake up!

But I don't hear myself scream

In my dream

I don't stir nor make a sound

Who will miss me

If I should not wake

The belly dancers says no one

I am filled with dread 

I had a boyfriend

A life

Friends who cared about me

But here I was fighting for my life

Fighting against the ultimate evil, 

Death! As I try to thrash 

I succeeded in thrashing in my sleep

I can feel the breath coming back into me

And I thrash until I am spat out of the dream

When I wake up I am

In a cloud sweat!

As I am shaking like a leave

In the autumn

What the fuck just happened was what I think is going to happen

On in my head

My first near death experience 

But it will

Not be my last

For I fear the night now

I dread going to sleep

As I fear that she will will 

Pop up from the abyss and try to take my soul 

As I went to put on my Pajamas I try not to think not to think about this shit show 

That I call my sleep!

Alas it is wispy washy

At the best of times and then there is the 

Fucking belly dancer from hell 

I am so worried about 

The idea of sleep especially 

REM sleep terrified me

But as soon as I lay in bed 

I fall to sleep like a bag of bricks 

Now what I wanted 

As I  find this skeleton figure 

Dancing towards me and 

I am paralyzed 

Her screaming my name 

I can feel my insides burst and rupture at the sound of

The nest will be my soul being sucked out of my body

Leaving me as a shell of a person of who I am

But I want to know why this emaciated demon 

Keeps coming to me in my most hideous 

Of nightmares

Threatening me 

With the worst of the torture that both man

And spirit world will have to offer me

I feel the cold sweet coming on 

But I say this very much so that 

This is a fallacy 

Something that my stress must of 

Created

Like a poltergeist 

But do they not talk

This is certainly not a poltergeist 

That is a demon from another dimension 

A hell realm

But little did I know that was just the beginning of my suffering

As soon I as find out who this is I will cast them 

Back the blasts that they came from

She twirls and swirls

And slowly and methodically 

Closer to me

As I find that this will not end well for me she says

Something completely disturbing....

"My sweet child!"

This could. It be my mother of birth 

She died of hepatitis so long ago

But if this is here....

She had become the personification of

Of death it's self

O death 

Would you spare me for another year!  I plead for 

My life! 

I start thrashing and the shits come off my bed

And I get even colder 

Then I wake up

Won't you spare me over til another year

Well what is this that I can't see

With ice cold hands takin' hold of me

Well I am death, none can excel

I'll open the door to heaven or hell

Whoa, death someone would pray

Could you wait to call me another day

The children prayed, the preacher preached

Time and mercy is out of your reach

I'll fix your feet til you cant walk

I'll lock your jaw til you cant talk

I'll close your eyes so you can't see

This very hour, come and go with me

I'm death I come to take the soul

Leave the body and leave it cold

To draw up the flesh off of the frame

Dirt and worm both have a claim

O, Death

O, Death

Won't you spare me over til another year

My mother came to my bed

Placed a cold towel upon my head

My head is warm my feet are cold

Death is a-movin upon my soul

Oh, death how you're treatin' me

You've close my eyes so I can't see

Well you're hurtin' my body

You make me cold

You run my life right outta my soul

Oh death please consider my age

Please don't take me at this stage

My wealth is all at your command

If you will move your icy hand

Oh the young, the rich or poor

Hunger like me you know

No wealth, no ruin, no silver no gold

Nothing satisfies me but your soul

O, death

O, death

Wont you spare me over til another year

Wont you spare me over til another year

Wont you spare me over til another year

I sing as I tried to wake my self up form this horrible night terror

And she comes closer and closer 

I see that the belly dancer 

Bares a striking resemblance 

Not unlike my own

This terrible 

Is this my birth mother coming to collect my soul 

I will never no even though

Alas I say her face

She looked like me

Is that an indication of the relation I might have of her

But as I see you cannot do DNA on a ghost

But then she says it again

In Romanian

"Come my sweet child!" 

That is that beyond the pale 

Then I shot of out bed 

Like bullet out of a pistol 

I find that I am having hot and could sweats 

That I can not under stand 

I am healthy so

What the fuck

As she really come to claim my soul

But I will not be too sure

I fear that she will come back 

Again tonight to finish me off

I am paralyzed that I might died at age 25

I am paranoid at the thought of sleep

But then I over think 

To much 

That night as I sleep,

I see her again screaming for 

My soul

She was saying 

That I will have a taste of my fate

But I try to run but I can not I am strapped to my bed by rotting vines

What ever shell I do!?



That was a poem my road I was not depressed or anything. I just woke up poem out of intriguing seeing where my writing would take me. This is about a banshee! If you ever heard of a banshee, those things do not let you live if you hear them scream! It’s very interesting how different cultures have this one spirit that’ll be the end of you it kind of interesting to be honest with you. You hear the loud sound of a banshee and that the end of the sound for your life I’ll give you an example of what a banshee is!


banshee is a female spirit in Irish folklore who heralds the death of a family member, usually by screaming, wailing, shrieking, or keening



That is what basically a band she is, but the idea of that is that I decide to make it over different culture to make it more interesting the banshee is one you hear someone’s screaming and shaking or keening hoping to get your soul that who either had the death of a family member so I don’t usually wanna get into this kind of stuff but that’s what the poem was about. I’m doing a verse novel about this particular topic, Gonna be very interesting to see where this will take me from which conference this bans will come from. It was already from Roman gypsy to a banshee is your imagination does not have a passport and it’s interesting enough that your imagination is connected to everything else as well I find that very interesting that I’ve written this very long poem and will continue to write this long poems! The home is basically about the same kind of thing which is what the band is, but in my mind what my birth mother was like that being said that’s enough said about that my afternoon consisted of sleeping a nice nap very annoying nap as I expected and then I ended up falling asleep then I ended up watching doctor g medical examiner, and had dinner, which was actually pretty good. The dinner was good. I think my favourite would be the grape leaves or the meatballs. I can’t really be too sure which one would be my favourite that being said the which to say I think the grape leaves were good too!    That being said I would continue the poem later  and I hope that I will become  a verse novel!  I alway wanted to try the verse novel!   There was when verse novel that I liked and I wished I remember the name I would be helpful!  The idea that I can’t remember the name of that book is interesting, but it was about a girl who is in ghost. It’s very interesting.  I wish I remembered that damn title!

Was very Christian got me and trying to write the No, it would be very interesting to see where that goes. In that case I would be very interested in seeing this novel. I’m guessing it’s not gonna be similar to million little pieces, where the whole books is a whole poem!  That would be interesting !  As you can tell that book will be called the belly dancer! As the belly dancer is the banshee!  That banshee is about my birth mother!  That being said I parents mentions she looked like a banshee but darker skinned!  I would have to agree about that the she was similar to a banshee!  Someone who was not a good person!   What king of person would leave their kid for dead on purpose!  That being said…..moving on!

Also, I had the rain constantly where I keep thinking that I’ve been in a college dorm for some odd reason. Why do I have that dream? I don’t know why but it’s just a dream that is constantly being put in my head somehow I don’t know if it’s  just my mind processing things!    I meantioned that and sad that we aren’t any different then iPad!  That is we slow and load and then at night we do the processing …..loading ……loading!

The only difference between us and iPad is we sometimes have fault and it’s made of plastic that being said I find that is the only difference between a human being and an iPad. We processed the information, not instantaneously, but instead at night time when we dream and go to sleep, also I find the same thing with the iPad. You have to turn it off in order for it to do it thing!   We are similar, but the same material humans can contain more information and can be more able to remember it. That being said I’d rather be more human says something if I knocked it on the ground it would be gone at least with my brain. I have a skull for me to deal with the knock on the head that would not end up like an iPad something that fragile or such!  I had this conversation about this morning!  It is interesting how that damn brain works!

I also went to the charity show and I go the first season of glee, you know the high school show with singing!  I’ve heard good things about glee many times in my life when I was in my early 20s, but never really got to see it so this is gonna be my first time seeing it. This would be very interesting. Indeed they mentioned something about madonna that’s good. I like Madonna. She is one of my favourite singers. I don’t know if she is gonna be her songs are gonna be in any of the episodes But just the fact that her name was mentioned, that’s not why I chose glee. I chose glee because it was very interesting to see because I wanted to see what the hype was a bear at one point in my life, which was in the in 2000’s 2010’s!  Add the time I was watching desperate, housewives, and now that is a show I like, but I never got to see glee because I was always having my head up my butt for some odd reason I didn’t feel it was a good enough show for my eyes, but now that I am matured, I think I might enjoy this for fact!   

My friend duck and I will be going to start our YouTube channel again that will be very interesting idea that I will be able to too with her again for the first time in three or four months because of the summer mines being so roasted that being said, it was very interesting and I couldn’t do very much creatively except for art work and maybe some nail art in the next post I’ll talk about my nail art that I did today!

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